


@ashen_demon posted a poll

by zeiida



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Attempt at Humor, Gen, Swearing, Texting, Twitter, literally everyone is pretty much here, no beta we die like Glenn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-10
Updated: 2020-04-10
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:28:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23568340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zeiida/pseuds/zeiida
Summary: It was late, and Byleth had things he should be working on. Too many things. So obviously, he spaced out instead and tried to procrastinate his responsibilities for as long as possible.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 55





	@ashen_demon posted a poll

am i qualified?   
@ashen_demon

hhhhh i literally cannot think right now

am i qualified?   
@ashen_demon

should i do it? is it official???? is college finally getting to me?

ɐʎ ɹoɟ ɹǝǝp uǝploƃ ǝɥʇ sʇɐɥʇ   
@imortalcorps

replying to  @ashen_demon

oof welcome to the club 

eddie   
@amyr

replying to  @ashen_demon

What's going on? Nothing too terrible I hope. Please ignore Claude, as he doesn't know when to shut up.

am i qualified?   
@ashen_demon

hold on

ɐʎ ɹoɟ ɹǝǝp uǝploƃ ǝɥʇ sʇɐɥʇ   
@imortalcorps

replying to  @aymr

oh please im a blessing

am i qualified?   
@ashen_demon

someone make the choice for me

yes

no

5 votes • 1 hrs left  


Dima   
@king_of_lions

replying to  @ashen_demon

What exactly are we voting for? Cause my answer drastically depends on that.

am i qualified?   
@ashen_demon

doesn't matter just vote if you wanna partake or not ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ its not life threatening

yuri bird   
@ashen_wolf

isn’t half the fun in polls not knowing what you’re voting for?

eddie   
@aymr

replying to  @ashen_wolf

Not if he decides to drive off the road!

* * *

Byleth lounged on his couch, staring at his laptop screen. While he may have been looking at the screen, he wasn’t actively taking in any of the details. More of staring through the monitor as it felt like twenty million thoughts rushed around in his head. He had no idea what actually triggered the sudden panic. Well, he kind of did. Between the hours he had to contribute to tutoring, and then to the lab that he ran, and between his own classes, Byleth felt like he had little to no break. He knew going into the term that between his classwork, and his duties he would be too overloaded but he figured he could manage. 

Sitting now on the couch, he realized he couldn’t. 

Of course there were things that demanded his attention, however was he doing any of it? Of course not. He’d much rather pretend that he was watching this video compilation of cats. Though when his phone went off, his ringer knocked him out of his thoughts. Byleth picked his phone up, seeing the contact name before he read the message.

underground lord  
  
hey youre not going to drive off a cliff right  
  
no  
  
good  
  
carry on  
  


Byleth smiled, reading the texts over once more before he put the phone. He told himself he would put down his phone until his phone was up, so he had no way of regretting the poll later.

* * *

yuri bird   
@ashen_wolf

replying to  @aymr

see he’s fine

  


ɐʎ ɹoɟ ɹǝǝp uǝploƃ ǝɥʇ sʇɐɥʇ   
@immortalcorps

replying to  @ashen_wolf

lmao his name is "Nosy" in your phone??? thats some audacity if ive ever seen it

yuri bird   
@ashen_wolf

well i'm not wrong. he knows how nosy he is. Speaking of Nosy, where did he go? 

Dima   
@king_of_lions

I told you fools he was going to do something stupid.

ɐʎ ɹoɟ ɹǝǝp uǝploƃ ǝɥʇ sʇɐɥʇ   
@immortalcorps

you and edelgard need to take a chill pill By is just fine  
i bet the poll is just for something dumb

eddie   
@aymr

Well, I guess we'll see in less than an hour what the hell he's doing

* * *

am i qualified?   
@ashen_demon

oh boy

58%yes

42%no

12 votes • Final results  


am i qualified?   
@ashen_demon

here we go i guess, we're really gonna make a statement

* * *

He knew it was getting late, he didn’t have to glance at the clock to know that. But he was feeling restless and he figured the person he wanted to contact would still be up. Granted he didn’t know if she’d be busy, or she would even accept considering they didn’t know each other all that well. They had hung out a few times outside of classes, and even studied together in big groups on occasion, but by no means were they actually close friends. Though he found himself searching her name in his contacts and started sending a message.

Dorothea  
  
hey could i ask a favor?  
  
depends on what it is  
  
you’ve dyed hair before, right?  
  
yeah! i dye Petra’s hair all the time!!!  
  
i know its super last minute, and definitely not tonight  
  
but  
  
could you by chance dye my hair?  
  
OH MY GOD REALLY?  
  
NO JOKE?  
  
WHAT COLOR?  
  
uhh?  
  
what do you think would look best?  
  
hmmm  
  
do  
  
do you like green colors?  
  
i definitely don’t… hate them?  
  
then what about a light shade?  
  
WAIT I HAVE THE PERFECT IDEA  
  
DO YOU TRUST ME  
  
dorothea i beg you please don’t make it look awful  
  
DO YOU TRUST ME  
  
i  
  
i guess??  
  
i don’t really have a choice  
  
GREAT! GIVE ME TWO DAYS!  
  


* * *

Byleth just blinked at the messages, and he could feel the regret pooling in his stomach. He knew he jested a few times that he was going to dye his hair, but he had no intent on actually following through. If he just never said anything, no one would know the poll was for the hair dye. But now it seemed he was in it for the long haul.

Fantastic.

Well, at least he had two days to back out if he wanted. The college student locked his phone, and with a sigh he set it aside and exited out of youtube. Not like he was watching the videos anyways. The student figured he’s had enough of a break, he has things he needs to be doing. Like grading a stack of papers that unfortunately, no matter how hard he wishes for it, won’t grade themselves.

* * *

Two days seemed to pass by almost too quickly, and before he knew it he was sitting in his apartment on a chair while Dorothea lathered his hair with _something_. Hell, she wouldn’t even tell him the color of his new hair. All she did was get him seated so she could get to work right away. While she was working, he tried to make light conversation, however she was so invested in the hair dye that her replies were often short. When she wasn’t talking, she was lightly hummin. The worst bits were when she excitedly let out a chuckle or too while working with his hair, because then Byleth felt even more anxiety. Or when she was bleaching his hair, it wasn’t the process that got to him. It was the smell. If he never had to sit with that again, Byleth would consider himself a lucky man.

Eventually Byleth grew fidgety, and gave into his urge to check his phone. Naturally the college student ended up on the app that devours most of his time.

* * *

yuri bird   
@ashen_wolf

fuckin-- balthus and i were headed back from campus and casually i noted there was a dead bird. this idiot says "where???" while he's looking up

King of Grappling   
@get_albreckt

replying to  @ashen_wolf

HEY I THOUGHT WE AGREED WE WOULDN'T TWEET ABOUT THAT

im just a dainty maiden   
@killda

can someone help me finish my math homework?? (✿◠‿◠) 

i studied the blade while u sucked   
@strike_u_r_out

Sometimes I have a hard time processing what the fuck falls out of Sylvain's mouth. Like "why did you have to make a sexy choice?" or "That shit sent my organs out my ass"

i am ferdinand von aegir   
@heiraegir

Who had the audacity to park in my spot?

* * *

Byleth snorted as he read through the tweets that rested on his home page. As if it was habit, he would reach for the like button, though never hitting retweet. Although when he hit Ferdinand’s tweet, Dorothea must’ve been reading over his shoulder.

“Eugh, you follow him?” 

“Yeah, I met him through Edelgard one day and we exchanged from there.” He shrugged as he continued to go down the dash. He had no real opinion on Ferdinand other than his tweets, which were no more obscure than anyone else’s.

“I blocked him a long time ago. Anyways,” she patted his shoulder, “time to go rinse your hair.” 

“Wait? Really? I thought it needs to sit?”

“How engrossed in those tweets are you? Did you not notice I finished the dye and left?” Dorothea crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow, obvious humor in her voice. To be honest, he didn’t. He was too busy stalking the profiles of his mutuals. However, Byleth couldn’t squeeze out a reply before Dorothea was urging him out of the chair into the bathroom where she would safely rinse his hair. 

Once she got his head under a faucet, she turned on the cold water and started to run her fingers through his hair. He wasn’t there for long, just long enough to do a quick shampoo and conditioner wash, then he was up and Dorothea left him for a minute, towel wrapped around his head. She left the bathroom, claiming she forgot her hair dryer in her bag. 

“Aha!” he heard her chim from his living room, finding whatever it was that she needed. Upon her return, she plugged it in and set it on the counter. gently taking the towel from Byleth before turning on the hair dryer. “I swear, you’re gonna love it.” She hummed as she used her fingers to help dry his hair. 

He hoped she was right.

* * *

“Aaaaaaand done!” Dorothea turned the blow dryer off and once again set it aside. “Turn around now!” She enthusiastically gestured to the mirror, a smile on her face. With a deep breath, Byleth stood up and turned around. His eyes widened slightly as he reached up to his hair. 

Instead of the dark hair he usually had, it was a very light green. And he had to admit, it actually suited him rather well and complimented his eyes more than his previous color did. 

“Well?! Do you love it? Or do you _love it_?” She clapped his hands, looking at him in the mirror. A smile creased the taller’s lips.

“It’s great, thanks Dorothea. Especially given the short time, I really do appreciate it.” Byleth offered his gratitude, as he mussed his hair up a bit, running a hand through freshly dyed and dried hair. 

“Hey it was no problem! Besides, I really wanted to test that dye anyways so it was a win win.” She shrugged as she collected her blow drier. “I’m glad you like it! But there’s one more thing we gotta do before I go.”

“What’s that?” Byleth, confused, tilted his head to the side. He had no idea what was left to do. However she snatched his phone from his hands and pulled up the camera. 

“Say cheese!”

* * *

am i qualified?   
@ashen_demon

well dorothea said i have to post the update to the poll but i refuse to use her photos so: i dyed my hair mint green

am i qualified?   
@immortalcorps

replying to  @ashen_demon

coward

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! It's been a super long while;;; I got super swamped so my bad? But uhh, take this which was entirely self indulgent and was literally just meant for me to learn how to do some coding! So yeah? I might continue this, who knows. This took way too long
> 
> Icons made by:  
> fehkinnes, alice-in-doll-land, sweet-soft-edits, odinsgrimoire, coffeeemblem, and rivers-in-the-icon  
> you can find all of them and their cute icons on tumblr!
> 
> Curious how I did this? Check out:
> 
> [making text messages](https://archiveofourown.org/works/6434845/chapters/14729722)  
> [making tweets](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22517134/chapters/53929063#workskin)


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